Being in the midst of the holiday season I always think of this story as I use it as a benchmark for judgment and perceptions. I would like to share my story as it may help you get excited AND stay excited about your 2019 goals – regardless of other people’s reactions or comments.
Anyone who knows me knows that I am a teeny bit in love with Brene Brown and her teachings. Truth be told – reading her books gave me the courage to do so many wonderful things. It lead me to my husband, I started my own business and I throw myself into projects that I may not be 100% qualified for BUT I know I can do it with a little determination and a lot of grit.
After I found Brene I was so excited to talk about her to anyone that would listen. She has had such a profound impact on my life that I was certain she would do the same for a number of my friends who had been searching for answers in their lives. A few years ago, I purchased her book “Daring Greatly” and passed it out at Christmas to this handful of friends. I eagerly awaited to see how the magical words of wisdom would transform the lives of others as it had my own.
What happened next totally shocked me.
I met one of these friends for brunch a short time after to talk about the holidays and all the events that had taken place. When she approached the table she had Brene’s book in her hand. Once I recognized the book I thought – wow, she loved it so much she can’t wait to talk about it with me. This is going to be amazing! That was, in fact, far from the truth. What happened was exactly the opposite – she returned the book to me saying, “What is it you love about this? It’s not for me. You can have it back.”
WHAAATTT.
The reason this hit me like a ton of bricks was the fact that I connected so deeply to this book it literally changed EVERY aspect of my life – and that is not an exaggeration. Someone else being completely unaffected by the words was a fact that I didn’t even consider. How was that even possible?
This event opened up a whole new level of understanding for me as I ventured into my entrepreneur journey. It made me realize not everyone wants what I want, or is in the same place I am. Of course, logically we know this but to have it spelled out for me in black and white with someone I was close to made this point crystal clear. Some people, even people who are close to us, experience life from such a different perspective they are 100% non-responsive to what may excite you. I have my goals and aspirations, but they are uniquely my own and just because I can barely contain myself when I talk about them, and may even shriek with glee just thinking about them (100% I do!!) – someone else may say, “that’s not for me – what else you got?”
This “returning the book” scene is still so vivid in my mind. This life lesson has taken me far in being able to separate my needs from those around me. As a business owner, it has taught me that I’m not going to be for everyone – that’s just life. I work hard to understand where people are coming from as it shapes who they are and what they think. I don’t take for granted what I think is what they think. My path s not your path. Understood. As a business owner and a writer, this is invaluable information to know as I carve my way to my own definition of success.
Equally as important, this episode taught me to share in someone else’s joy even when the source of their joy is “not for me.” Sharing in someone else’s joyful moments will create precious memories for them to cherish and will warm your heart. We can all be successful and we can all celebrate each others success.
I continue to follow, learn and tell others about the life changing lessons I learned from my pal Brene Brown, and I continue to learn about myself as I move through this world of the unexpected.
Until next time – dream, experience and love your life.
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